bad bad feelings

from the moment i was born, i knew things weren't right
the doctor told my dad your kids wings are too tight
a bird sings without flight, sight unseen, the prognosis might be mean
it's bark with no bite, i got no chance a ferocious fighting fiend
i'm too dark when it's light, i live stark and all heat, with some meat on my bones
only comfortable when i'm all alone, or spitting shit on this microphone
so don't take that tone, or start to moan and groan, cuz i've sewn this shit up
and made myself an nice little package off bad bad feelings, and sad dad dealings
so mad i'm reeling when i hit the ceiling i don't wanna come down
won't dumb down my own experience so y'all can relate
cause it's hard to concentrate when you sit down with a plate of guilty conscience
that built these monsters when i play these concerts i song sing nonsense
just play dense, i must stay tense my only defense against my better sense
ignore the past so i can blast fast forward and blend with the other sheep in the herd
instead of being too absurd to be heard or understood i always tried to be good
and do what i should and keep to myself that's why now i need too much help
and there's nothing out there except anger and depression, and so much second guessing too much stressin, smoking sess and, learn my lesson, now i'm hard pressing all of these bad bad feelings

chorus

i got these bad bad feelings
i know these things take time
i got these bad bad feelings
this life i'm livin ain't mine
i got these bad bad feelings
i'm my own worst enemy, my own hate crime
with no one defending me, but i'll be just fine
with my bad feelings

and puberty was duping me
like cruel jokes, so dyke cool smokes
then sniffs, spirit lifts
so i don't care and people won't stare
stop combing my hair, still fair pretty well with the ladies
cause after all this is how god made me, lazy
a man who can give birth to babies
sent to save these other kids who know how it feels
when you heart steals parts that make you feel real
and you say big deal but what would you know
when i go to public bathrooms unnoticed it's a luxury
i wrote this cause it sucks to be alienated
hated and baited by strangers
i waited elated by danger
this is fated you say derange her or him or it they whatever
never once did i try to die
i lie clever cause i'd rather sever all ties
than try to disguise whose eyes i'm seeing through
despise what beings do to fit in
careful not to shit in where you're sitting
pitting one against many i got plenty of shame and 20 to fame
someday you'll all now my name my flames still burning hearts still churning
while i'm learning to be just okay about what they say
i can't just be gay naw i have to be the consolation prize

chorus

i got these bad bad feelings
i know these things take time
i got these bad bad feelings
this life i'm livin ain't mine
i got these bad bad feelings
i'm my own worst enemy, my own hate crime
with no one defending me, but i'll be just fine
with my bad feelings

and now even though i know i'm the flyest mother fucker with a switchable dick
quick witted, rarely out spitted, outfitted fairly hard headed
sick titted man, stick to the plan tricked so i ran quick, to the van
as fast as i can, so my gay legs can take me, and day breaks still don't break me
stay cakes so fruits can bake me pray the lord will take me when it's said and done
after living two parts one
son it's not fun and games
when one life's got to names
and my only hope for fame's the circus
even though i spit the crazy tercets
people only see the surface
just want a moment to unearth this
prove i'm not so worthless piss in a bottle
will someone please coddle
where's my mommy to swaddle all of these bad bad feelings